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Goat Simulator
Heist Info
Contractor Vlad
Contract Days 2
Loud / Stealth ✔ / ✘
Loot Goat
Base experience (XP) (day 1) 3,000 (on start (bug))
+1,500 (drilling store / saw finished)
+1,500 (powerbox hacked)
+1,500 (per removed debris)
+1,500 (per secured goat (up to 15 required))
Experience (day 2) 3,000 (completion)
+500 (per secured goat (up to 15 required))
+500 (per cage picked up by plane (1 required))
+7,000 (first arrival of plane)
+4,500 (arriving at bridge)
+4,500 (opened bridge controls door)
+2,000 (bridge rotated)
Farmer Miserable:
+50,000 (securing all goats in separate cages on OVK+)
+500 (per construced cage
(13-15 depending on difficulty))
+500 (per cage picked up by plane (13-15 depending on difficulty))
+500 (per secured goat
(13-15 depending on difficulty))
Other
Internal name peta
Achievement(s) In the first day of the Goat Simulator heist, secure 6 goats in the escape truck within 1 minute of it arriving. Unlocks the "Scout Goat" mask, "Goat Eye" material and "Giraffe" pattern. In the Goat Simulator heist, throw a goat in the air, kill one enemy and catch the goat before it lands. Unlocks the "Wet Goat" mask, "Hay" material and "Goat Face" pattern. Complete the Goat Simulator heist on the Death Wish difficulty or above. Complete the second day of the Goat Simulator heist within 6 minutes from when the escape car is available. Unlocks the "Goat Goat" mask, "Flamingo Eye" material and "Illumigoati" pattern. In the second day of the Goat Simulator heist, send all goats in separate cages on the OVERKILL difficulty or above. Unlocks the "Slick Goat" mask, "Tongue" material and "Fur" pattern. Complete the Goat Simulator job on the Mayhem difficulty or above. Complete the Goat Simulator job on the Death Sentence difficulty with the One Down mechanic activated.
Trophies Extract 25 goats on Day 2 of the Goat Simulator heist.
v·d·e

The Goat Simulator heist is a two day heist in PAYDAY 2 released on January 14, 2016, in the DLC of the same name, contracted by Vlad. It involves the crew chasing goats that have cocaine bags in their stomachs. It is the ninth contract given by Vlad.

Day 1 (This was not the deal)[]

Objectives[]

  1. Collect the goats (Normal: 5, Hard: 7, Very Hard: 10, Overkill: 13, Mayhem+: 15)
  2. Secure the goats
  3. Escape!

Assets[]

Purchasable[]

Nade asset full
Grenade Case
Price: $3,000 (Normal)
$4,500 (Hard)
$6,000 (Very Hard)
$9,000 (Overkill)
$15,000 (Mayhem)
$21,000 (Death Wish)
$27,000 (Death Sentence)
Requires Gage Weapon Pack #01 DLC
Asset-ammo-bag
Ammo Bag
Price: $4,000 (Normal)
$6,000 (Hard)
$8,000 (Very Hard)
$12,000 (Overkill)
$20,000 (Mayhem)
$28,000 (Death Wish)
$36,000 (Death Sentence)


Asset-medic-bag
Doctor Bag
Price: $6,000 (Normal)
$9,000 (Hard)
$12,000 (Very Hard)
$18,000 (Overkill)
$30,000 (Mayhem)
$42,000 (Death Wish)
$54,000 (Death Sentence)


Intel[]

Asset-Risk-Level
Risk Level


Asset gage assignment
Gage Courier Packages



Walkthrough[]

Day 1 involves the PAYDAY gang collecting scattered goats around the area of Downtown. With the assistance of a Longfellow, they must bring the goats to a truck and escape.

At the start players will spawn at a random spot of the map. A very large crowd of NPCs, ranging from civilians, gang members, and police officers, are seen to be distracted by the wreck, but eventually, all will get alerted and the heist will go loud. Players though, can briefly take advantage of this by quickly dominating the officers for hostages or to convert them.

Most of the goats will be out in the open, standing and laying in random spots, and some jumping on cars and even in a hot dog stand. However, there are some goats that will require the crew to do additional objectives to get:

  • There will be a goat in the burning building, it can be seen hanging on a window ledge of said infrastructure, requiring the crew to find several fire extinguisher valves and remove debris to get to it.
  • A goat will be stuck to a fan in a store or up on a scaffold with electrified ladders, forcing the crew to hack nearby electrical boxes to grab it safely.
  • A goat may be stuck on top of a lamppost, the latter having to be sawed down (not with the OVE9000 saw, a placed saw) to get to the former.
  • A goat may be inside a closed store, forcing the crew to drill the door shutter and lockpick or shoot the doors so they can grab the trapped goat.

After a while, Vlad sends in an escape truck that will take 2 minutes and will appear at a random location. It has two cages in which heisters must secure the goats in. After all the animals are stowed away, the Longfellow must be driven into the truck for the day to be completed.

A handful of ATMs are scattered around the area and it is recommended for at least one heister to bring the OVE9000 saw to open them and substantially increase the payout.

Day 2 (Dirty Work)[]

Objectives[]

  • Defend the Barn
  • Looping till done:
  1. Assemble the cage
  2. Put the Goats in the cage
  3. Fire up the balloon when ready
  4. Defend the Goats
  5. Get in the Longfellow car in the back of the Truck
  6. Close the bridge
  7. Escape into the new truck

Assets[]

Purchasable[]

Nade asset full
Grenade Case
Price: $3,000 (Normal)
$4,500 (Hard)
$6,000 (Very Hard)
$9,000 (Overkill)
$15,000 (Mayhem)
$21,000 (Death Wish)
$27,000 (Death Sentence)
Requires Gage Weapon Pack #01 DLC
Asset-ammo-bag
Ammo Bag
Price: $4,000 (Normal)
$6,000 (Hard)
$8,000 (Very Hard)
$12,000 (Overkill)
$20,000 (Mayhem)
$28,000 (Death Wish)
$36,000 (Death Sentence)


Asset-medic-bag
Doctor Bag
Price: $6,000 (Normal)
$9,000 (Hard)
$12,000 (Very Hard)
$18,000 (Overkill)
$30,000 (Mayhem)
$42,000 (Death Wish)
$54,000 (Death Sentence)


Asset barn planks
Planks
Price: $13,000 (Normal)
$19,500 (Hard)
$26,000 (Very Hard)
$39,000 (Overkill)
$65,000 (Mayhem)
$91,000 (Death Wish)
$117,000 (Death Sentence)


Intel[]

Asset-Risk-Level
Risk Level


Asset gage assignment
Gage Courier Packages



Walkthrough[]

Day 2 begins with Vlad's driver preparing to extract the coke from the goats in a barn. However, it quickly becomes sour when the Honduran gang the coke was stolen from, tracks down the crew and a shootout ensues. This in turn brings the police in full force. Heisters only have a minute to eliminate the gangsters and board up the windows to prepare for the inevitable assault.

The gang is soon tasked with setting up a metal cage, like GO Bank, and haul the goats to the cage. The pilot will drop the cage parts at a random location, either the Silo, the bridge, or in front of the barn. On harder difficulties, a SWAT Van Turret will appear near the bridge to harass the crew. After the parts are placed, at least one goat must be thrown into the cage in order to deploy a balloon. The pilot will take 2 minutes to arrive but sometimes, he may miss and require additional time to catch the balloon.

After all the goats are flown away, players must evacuate with the Longfellow quickly. The journey to the escape point is far from quiet, as the police have set up barricades with more turrets in attempts to stop the crew. At one point, there is a chance a Black Bulldozer will launch fuel barrels and detonate them to damage the Longfellow. Eventually, they encounter a turned bridge with civilians present and are tasked in overriding the security measures. The door can be drilled, sawed open, or be destroyed with C4. On occassion, the control room may be flooded with tear gas to prevent players from taking cover within. The bridge will take 2 minutes to rotate and allow players to proceed to the escape point.

The FBI Files[]

Our officers arriving at the scene were shocked by the chaos that met them. The Payday gang was in a full-blown shootout with the Honduran cartel, with several goats running amok all over the neighborhood. Upon examining one of those goats retrieved from the scene, we found a package of cocaine inserted rectally in the animal.

My Notes: These damned criminals are willing to do anything nowadays - smuggling coke using Goats? Anyhow, this is not like the Clowns. It was sloppy and poorly executed. Even though they got away with a big fortune, it doesn't fit their usual MO. Someone else was behind this. Someone with power and influence. The Russian guy we found hiding in a dumpster still hasn't given anything up yet, but we'll break him sooner or later.

Achievements & Trophies[]

Coffee Stain Coffee Stain
Complete the Goat Simulator heist on the Death Wish difficulty or above.
BAAaa...*BANG*...aaAAH BAAaa...*BANG*...aaAAH
In the Goat Simulator heist, throw a goat in the air, kill one enemy and catch the goat before it lands. Unlocks the "Wet Goat" mask, "Hay" material and "Goat Face" pattern.
Farmer Miserable Farmer Miserable
In the second day of the Goat Simulator heist, send all goats in separate cages on the OVERKILL difficulty or above. Unlocks the "Slick Goat" mask, "Tongue" material and "Fur" pattern.
Goat in 60 Seconds Goat in 60 Seconds
In the first day of the Goat Simulator heist, secure 6 goats in the escape truck within 1 minute of it arriving. Unlocks the "Scout Goat" mask, "Goat Eye" material and "Giraffe" pattern.
Hazzard County Hazzard County
Complete the second day of the Goat Simulator heist within 4 minutes from when the escape car is available. Unlocks the "Goat Goat" mask, "Flamingo Eye" material and "Illumigoati" pattern.

The following appeared on January 12, 2016. They were replaced on January 14, 2016.

Achievement locked 1...
Achievement locked 2...
Achievement locked 3...
Achievement locked 4...
Achievement locked Zzz...

Best Use of a Farm Animal Best Use of a Farm Animal
Complete the Goat Simulator job on the Normal difficulty or above.
Now We Know What a Goat Sounds Like Now We Know What a Goat Sounds Like
Complete the Goat Simulator job on the Hard difficulty or above.
You Goat Away You Goat Away
Complete the Goat Simulator job on the Very Hard difficulty or above.
Golf Oscar Alpha Tango Sierra Golf Oscar Alpha Tango Sierra
Complete the Goat Simulator job on the OVERKILL difficulty or above.
There is no Goat Level There is no Goat Level
Complete the Goat Simulator job on the Mayhem difficulty or above.
GOTs! GOTs!
Complete the Goat Simulator job on the Death Sentence difficulty or above.
You Goat to be Kidding Me... You Goat to be Kidding Me...
Complete the Goat Simulator job on the Death Sentence difficulty with the One Down mechanic activated.

The following achievement was removed on October 5, 2016.

Pro Goat Pro Goat
Complete the Goat Simulator pro job on the Death Wish difficulty.

Trivia[]

  • Goat Simulator is the first DLC heist contracted by Vlad, the first multi-day heist contracted by Vlad, the first multi-day heist since Hoxton Breakout, the first multi-day paid-DLC heist since Hotline Miami, and the first pro job heist in both cases since them. Since then, the pro job system was removed, making this fact obsolete.
  • The goats are classified as loot bags and are invulnerable to damage. Due to their ability to ram and/or kick players into bleedout they can be considered lethal loot as well.
  • This is the first heist to introduce helicopters with snipers.
    • The helicopters where Snipers fire from appear not to be solid, as once killed, the Snipers will fall through them. 
  • The Honduran gangsters use the same models and textures as the Mendoza cartel henchmen.
  • This heist takes place after Meltdown and after Hoxton Revenge, as the rat's death is mentioned in the mission briefing and day 2.
  • The pilot on Day 2 (Vlad's cousin) was apparently a Vietnam War veteran, as he likened the heated firefight happening during the mission to the battle of Khe Sanh. He was also once employed by Delta but fired by the FAA at some point, presumably for his incompetence.
  • The pilot refers to himself as "Ghost Rider" when calling the gang for the first time.
  • The Goat Simulator heist is a collaboration with the game of the same name created by Coffee Stain Studios. Although it was first made as a joke, it became popular due to YouTube and other platforms.
  • The heist's internal name of peta is a reference to the animal rights group People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, or "PETA" for short. The hilariously unethical treatment of the goats in the mission is a jab at PETA's own documented history of hypocrisy and mass euthanasia of the animals they claimed to "save".
  • This is one of several heists to have been worked on by Andreas Rönnberg, developer of the game Cry of Fear.[1]
  • It is possible to get the Longfellow stuck in day 1 of the heist, by driving it on the truck ramp and dipping into a curb on the sidewalk, where the front wheels will get crammed between the road and the car's chassis, and the rear wheels dangling above the truck ramp.
  • A random Payday Trivia message during a loading screen jokes "No animals were hurt during the making of the Goat Simulator Heist".

Video[]

References[]

  1. Andreas Rönnberg (January 14, 2016) "The Latest Payday 2 Heist I've been Working on Just got Released". Facebook. Retrieved July 5, 2020.


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