|Affiliation(s)|| The Payday Gang|
|Portrayed by||John Cleese|
|Voiced by||John Cleese|
- "As Mark Twain once said: "The lack of money is the root of all evil!""
- —Aldstone sharing some wisdom with the player.
Aldstone is an aging, slightly eccentric and seemingly very loyal servant to Hoxton, and seems to be incredibly nonchalant about Hoxton's career as a criminal.
He remained at Hoxton's mansion tending to the graves and house. He may have been alone for all that time, as he had apparently taken to talking to the paintings, though he is saner than he sounds, given that he hasn't gone entirely "nuts" (yet).
Hoxton contacted him to ask him to come to assist the Payday Gang in Washington D.C. He tends to the Safe House while the crew is out heisting.
- Aldstone is played by English comedian and actor John Cleese, who is best known as a member of the sketch comedy troupe Monty Python.
- When near the Vault, he might be seen walking in strange manner, an obvious reference to sketch Ministry of Silly Walks.
- At other times he may mention that Wolf wanted him to buy a parrot (something he doesn't want to do again), and that a cousin of his runs a hotel in the countryside, something he thinks would be "too stressful" for him.
- Aldstone is the third person to refer to Hoxton by his real name.
- Given that "Aldstone" is an English surname, the butler's given name is currently unknown. It is also strange and atypical for a master-butler relationship for Hoxton to not call his family servant by his given name.
- At the end of the trailer for Hoxton's Housewarming, Aldstone remarks (presumably to Hoxton) that "Selling drills on the black market wasn't the best idea you've ever had, now was it?" This is an obvious reference to the massive backlash that Overkill received when they first announced microtransactions were being added.
- Aldstone may state that he was married once. He notes that it was "very expensive".
- Aldstone appears to never remove his tailcoat as he wears it throughout the entirety of his introductory trailer, even while on a flight from England to the United States.
- His trip to Washington is very reminiscent of a travel scene in the movie Snatch, using similar styles of jump cuts.
- Based on his dialogue, Aldstone is quite a neat freak. Due to his obsession with cleanliness, he had taken up cleaning the gang's weapons and ammo in his free time (however he notes that some of them are rather difficult to polish), mending their outfits and even ironing out their money. In particular, he has a great distaste for the ever-so-common police raids since they deal considerable damage to the furniture and tend to leave behind a mess, which he's the one who has to clean up afterward.
- Aldstone's character model is very tall, towering over the heisters by quite a lot. This is a nod to his actor's rather impressive 6' 5'' height.
- Aldstone will have a remark commenting on the last heist the player completed when entering the safehouse.